Palmetto Bugs
If I had to vote in a contest for world’s ugliest animal I would have to cast my ballet for the Palmetto Bug. These things are gross. It also has horrible manners.
Palmetto bugs are reddish brown and grow up to two inches in length. It is also known as the American cockroach. It has a pair of large wings on its back that can be used for flying, but wings that are tough enough to act like a shield when the cockroach is on the ground. Palmetto bugs need moisture to survive and only live in warm, tropical climates. It can be found outdoors across the southern United States, but is also a common insect found in commercial facilities with high heat and humidity.
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Once, while in New Orleans, I saw a cockroach on a kitchen counter. I think it saw me, too. I’m pretty sure of this, because the cockroach stood up on its back legs, making the terrifyingly large bug appear even bigger, and it hissed at me. Apparently Madagascar hissing cockroaches aren’t the only species of roaches that can audibly alert you to their discontent. Next, there was a kind of showdown. The cockroach spread its wings. It seemed to be gauging my reaction to determine if I would have the courage to confront it with the shoe I had taken off of my foot for the purpose of squashing it. Sensing that I was indeed planning on making a move, the cockroach leapt into the air with a flurry of beating wings and flew straight towards my face, sending me ducking for cover. The battle ended with me grabbing a can of Raid so I could kill the roach from a distance. I would have to say the Palmetto bug won that showdown. See what I mean about horrible manners?
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The easiest way to kill roaches that have made their way inside the house is to take a boot and smash them. I am not the least bit sympathetic towards such a rude trespasser. If you are skittish around big, flying, filth covered, insects that can bite (I did mention that they can bite, right?) as I am, then you can also use an aerosol insecticide like Raid that is labeled as a roach killer. To treat a larger infestation of American cockroaches use a desiccant powder, like Borax or Drione Dust. The dust should be sprinkled along the edges of walls or cabinets, or any other crack where there is evidence of roach activity like shed skins, brown fecal stains, or dead bodies. (Don’t ask me why the dead bodies always seemed to be turned over on their backs with the legs curled up. That’s a whole different article.) An insecticide duster could help you apply the Borax more efficiently.
Still too complicated? Buy a cat. Palmetto bugs make fantastic toys for fun loving felines. Or, simply call the local exterminator to solve your pest control needs.
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11 Nov 2008, 23:38


